Wean Me Gently

It has been more than a year since I last wrote a blog post. Life has been busy as a working mom. I decided to change directions with this post a little bit.

My boy has been weaning much more as of late. It's bittersweet as I have loved, nurtured and nourished him for a little over 24 months now. I developed the philosophy in our breastfeeding relationship that I would promote him to self-wean, meaning when he felt he was ready to stop then he could make the decision when the time was right for him.

There were moments (especially when he would nurse for literally hours and hours at a time....and I promise you this is no exaggeration) when I could not imagine him ever wanting to stop. I now regret the moments when I may have rushed him through a feeding or when I encouraged him with another activity so that I could carry on with something else or when I winced in pain as my new pregnancy caused my breasts to be so tender and swollen. Each and every moment of breastfeeding I have shared with my boy has been so special. Breastfeeding is a bond so special and rare that it cannot be mimicked by anyone or anything. Such a unique experience...one for which I am eternally grateful to share with my son.

Now when my precious son nurses I cannot help but wonder if it will be the last time. My eyes well with tears as I have watched him suckle from the moment he was born straight through into toddlerhood. The changes we have gone through together through this shared, common experience has been life-changing. I can well imagine what it will be like one day to stare upon my son as a grown man and remember fondly our sweet, nourishing embraces and know that I had something to do with creating the strong man he will become.

I came across a poem that perfectly captures my bittersweet feelings of this waning relationship:

Wean Me Gently
by Cathy Cardall

I know I look so big to you,
Maybe I seem too big for the needs I have.
But no matter how big we get,
We still have needs that are important to us.
I know that our relationship is growing and changing,
But I still need you. I need your warmth and closeness,
Especially at the end of the day
When we snuggle up in bed.
Please don't get too busy for us to nurse.
I know you think I can be patient,
Or find something to take the place of a nursing;
A book, a glass of something,
But nothing can take your place when I need you.
Sometimes just cuddling with you,
Having you near me is enough.
I guess I am growing and becoming independent,
But please be there.
This bond we have is so strong and so important to me,
Please don't break it abruptly.
Wean me gently,
Because I am your mother,
And my heart is tender.

....sigh.....Isn't that a great poem? I've cried every time I have read it. With Baby #2 due in 20 more weeks I am grateful that I will get to develop and nurture a brand new breastfeeding relationship.

But I'm still a little sad about my breastfeeding relationship with Baby #1 that will soon come to a close.

The Rants, Raves, Ramblings and Confessions of a Middle Class Mom

Hi All,

I say "all" as though anyone is reading this.....hahahaha. Oh well. I am doing this for me as I've got lots that needs to get off my chest. So let's begin....

Dear God, It's me... Margaret.....oh wait, that was the Judy Blume book I read as a girl. I'm a little rusty at the writing thing so let's start again.

I'm a mom from the typical middle class family. Just like millions of other people out there in the world. And I decided it's time for me to have my own blog. See, I have a Soap Box. A very large soap box. In fact, it's so big that I can barely see the people down below. There's nothing in particular that makes me think I live my life so perfectly that I can judge other peoples' lives from the perch of my soap box. But I do. Or perhaps rather I just wonder what the heck people are doing with their lives.

And don't think that this is just another blog of some poor miserable mom wining about life. In fact, I can be equally as self critical and can confess the mishaps and wrong-doings of my own life. Take for instance not that long ago my husband and I were driving along the road heading off to meet some friends to go on a hike. While driving along we were so busy talking about how much better we live our lives than other people that we completely missed the turn off to the hiking spot and continued driving for another 45 minutes. Eventually we turned around once we realized our stupid mistake, got in a big fight, and arrived at our destination in complete silence as we were seething at one another. Life happens. Nobody is perfect.

But since this is my blog I get to decide who I am going to write about and what catches my fancy. Plus, I want to make sure I don't get so bitter and angry at the atrocities of life that I see happen all around me that I figured having a blog will allow me the opportunity to get it off my chest.

But fair is fair. If you have to listen to all my ramblings then I should share the good stuff about me too. I'll tell you a little about myself. I'm a middle class mom from Canada with a great husband who works hard for a living to support the family, a 9 month old son who entertains and amazes me more than I ever could have imagined, and 2 miniature dachshunds (aka weiner dogs) who smother me with cuddles on a daily basis. I'm currently on maternity leave and dread the day I return to work. We make a decent income but I have to go back to work to help maintain the lifestyle to which we have grown accustomed. We own a modest home with a modest mortgage. We work hard and because of this we have begun to enjoy the rewards of this hardwork with the occaisional vacation, trip to the spa, and dinner out at a restaurant. Overall, life is good.

Now some of the things I have to say are really going to rub people the wrong way. The way I see it despite the average middle class family being the norm in most the Western world, it has become quite politically incorrect to call on people's mistakes should they fall outside the "norm". Even though a great deal of the system is out there to offer supports to anyone who isn't middle class. But that's how I see things and I tell it like it is.